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The Autobiography of Russell
Life from a different perspective
... Beware the ticked off boy
You all hate me. You don't comment on my entires (usually) and you act like this doesn't exist. Like it's not a part of me here. As if what I write here has no impact on me publicly.

:( They forgot about me. Whatever they did today was more important then me. More important then Ashley's essays she wanted my help on rewriting.

TOTALLY FREAKIN' SCREWED UP MY DAY! I'm set back an entire freakin' day on getting that book read and an essay written on it with nothing in return. FRICK! I want to flay them all alive, especially Aaron if he let them get away with forgetting me. And then I'll flay ... the whole lot of them. UGH!

Robert is lying to me. Ashey, Laura, Jo, and Aaron forget me. The whole social scene is seriously looking like it's not worth it right now.

P.S. Would it make a difference if I said I just considered suicide? Cause I did...

[Edit 11-25-03: I did not mean this in total seriousness or literally. I meant the flaying as a figure of speech, to get in touch with them and find out what happened and why we didn't get together. As for the suicide, I don't have it in me to kill myself (much less anyone else). Everyone thinks about suicide occasionally, but they don't actually mean it or follow through with it.]

[Edit: Link forward to further information and appology]

Current Mood: annoyed/ticked/depressed
Current Music: "Unsung" by Vanessa Carlton

22 comments or Leave a comment
illian From: illian Date: November 8th, 2003 07:10 pm (UTC) (Link)
No, I just usually am either rushed or I'm not sure what to say.

That sucks.
zimzat From: zimzat Date: November 8th, 2003 07:38 pm (UTC) (Link)
wow... I didn't even think you read my journal. I suppose I thought you were somebody really high up and didn't bother with someone like me.

I do enjoy your Humor and stuff, though. My personal thought is perhaps you'll get that promotion anyway due to being there so often by yourself. (I would be kinda thrilled to work at a library by myself, I think. Any job, actually)
shadesfox From: shadesfox Date: November 8th, 2003 08:14 pm (UTC) (Link)

I don't hate you. Why should I hate you? I don't post comments often ^_^;; I'll try and comment more though. And I am all to familiar with being forgoten. Actually, in my case it was less forgetting and more they just wanted to ditch me.
mrtrblmkr1 From: mrtrblmkr1 Date: November 8th, 2003 10:12 pm (UTC) (Link)
*completely agrees*
That exactly the words I
wanted to use.
*offers a hug and some incense*
I just used this "Sea Breeze"
and wow does it smell beautiful :D
zimzat From: zimzat Date: November 9th, 2003 05:03 pm (UTC) (Link)
Hmm, I haven't burned any incense in a while. Perhaps I should find a stick and burn it. It'd certainly be better then the consequences of burning people.
mrtrblmkr1 From: mrtrblmkr1 Date: November 9th, 2003 08:00 pm (UTC) (Link)
nooo!! it's meant to be put in a potpourri burner! or like left in a pot on the stove...
zimzat From: zimzat Date: November 9th, 2003 05:00 pm (UTC) (Link)
*nods* Sorry. I'll work on it. Ya'll don't deserve being burdened with my issues.
cloudfett From: cloudfett Date: November 8th, 2003 11:01 pm (UTC) (Link)

Get over it...

Quit being an attention/pitty whore, thats my job...get over it...
zimzat From: zimzat Date: November 9th, 2003 09:34 am (UTC) (Link)

Re: Get over it...

Get off your cross for once. Someone else needs it more then you do.
ellixis From: ellixis Date: November 9th, 2003 03:10 pm (UTC) (Link)
It's my experience that people don't comment on ouch-y entries because they don't want to say the wrong thing and make it hurt more.

I'm here. Just quiet sometimes.
zimzat From: zimzat Date: November 9th, 2003 04:58 pm (UTC) (Link)
hmm... The logic seems flawed. I think it would make the problem worse if ignored.

I keep thinking about how a female will say "Nothing" is wrong when it is obvious something is, and expect the guy (or whoever) to figure it out and console them.

It seems that is what I've been doing and getting no where.
ellixis From: ellixis Date: November 9th, 2003 11:26 pm (UTC) (Link)
It may be flawed logic, but it's emotional logic, I think.
rockinivy From: rockinivy Date: November 9th, 2003 05:49 pm (UTC) (Link)
I dont hate you either... I read you journal all the time... cause basically you are the only friend i have in Live journal [if you consider me one]...and its interesting what you write sometimes.. so i enjoy reading it... also be careful and think about life more... Being ignore by a bunch of idiots that pretend to be your freind and are rude its not worth you life... believe me... I know.. Ive been there :)

I also dont comment much because as many others.. im not sure what to say...but i enjoy reading it.. it made me have a whole new perspective on how you really are...
*sorry about the writting errors, english is not my 1st language*
zimzat From: zimzat Date: November 10th, 2003 07:58 am (UTC) (Link)
cause basically you are the only friend i have in Live journal [if you consider me one]
I don't see any reason why not.


but i enjoy reading it.. it made me have a whole new perspective on how you really are...
*raises an eyebrow in simple curiosity* How did you view me before, and in what way(s) did it change?
rockinivy From: rockinivy Date: November 10th, 2003 04:01 pm (UTC) (Link)


Well, U know xenocide right, you know that little disagreement we had one time because of the multi situation last round and because of the whole stuff that was happening with the xenojunkies.. I just saw you a little arrogant, but overtime you have to look deeper than just comments and the journal helped that...So i see you know as anyone else.. human... and I get your sense of humor now...:D
From: (Anonymous) Date: November 20th, 2003 08:12 pm (UTC) (Link)

I am not rude!

I was mentioned it that journal entry and I am far from rude. I go to school with him and only wasnted to help him. Now I fear his life and my own. Do not judge people so quickly that you do not know. have a good night! :)

P.S. next time think about the things you say about other people.
zimzat From: zimzat Date: November 23rd, 2003 05:07 pm (UTC) (Link)

Re: I am not rude!

I wish I had some idea who this was... Cause that didn't seem to make much sense. >_>
From: (Anonymous) Date: November 20th, 2003 06:27 pm (UTC) (Link)

hey i have never used live journal or heard about it

hey russel,
this is Aaron the guy u wanna flay, i did not hang out with ashley, jo, or laura saturday. i am sorry if i made you feel like you don't exist, or alone, i know how it feels to be ignored or invisible to the world. I like you and want to keep u as a friend, i don't want u to hate me. Sometimes i don't talk to you that much, because i fell like i make you uncomfortable when i drink and smoke. I need you to tell me its ok or not ok too. i know that u are not an extroverted person but u need to tell people how you feel. U can't keep it bottled up, or you will eventually explode. I don't want you to hurt yourself. please don't, i don't have live journal or probably will not come back to this page. but u can email me at aaronbrown666@hotmail.com any time u want
only u can email me not anyone else who comes across this posted comment.
anyways, don't feel hurt your not alone
zimzat From: zimzat Date: November 23rd, 2003 05:59 pm (UTC) (Link)

Re: hey i have never used live journal or heard about it

=\ I'm sorry about this whole mess.

To be frank, when I first met you I hoped we would be able to get together. Things didn't turn out that way, and I'll be okay with that. Seeing as that isn't likely to happen I don't give much opinion to what you do; smoking, drinking, drugs, whatever. Just so long as you don't do the second to last one around me.

From: (Anonymous) Date: November 20th, 2003 08:29 pm (UTC) (Link)

I already feel FLAYED from you ....

Dear Russel,
This is Laura... I was extremely upset to find what you had written about me...and yourself. I'm sorry for not giving you enough attention but I was really trying. School has been hard on me and my social status was pushed to the side.I never meant for you to feel alone. You should have known you were welcome to talk to me, Ashley, jo, or Aaron any time you wanted. It takes more than one person to have a friendship and talk [now I don't know what we ever had]. You are a good person and the only one who brings you down is yourself. To those others who read this,note that, Russel was really a friend to us and this article was, to me, very hurting.
The school found your entry and the police did not take it lighly- nor did I.WE are only concerned about YOU. I'm really confused now and don't know what else to say. If you want to talk to me- then do so and I will be glad to listen. But, this was very upsetting and I no longer know how to approach you. I wish you the best of luck and try to remember that there is always sunshine after the storm.
zimzat From: zimzat Date: November 23rd, 2003 06:28 pm (UTC) (Link)

Re: I already feel FLAYED from you ....

uh huh...

I wish you knew me better then you think you know me. That's really all I can think to say to this.

I'm also curious to know how the school knows and why the police knows as well.
mrtrblmkr1 From: mrtrblmkr1 Date: November 24th, 2003 04:15 pm (UTC) (Link)

Re: I already feel FLAYED from you ....

Not to be an ass, but I also have a friend named Laura (broke it off past summer) and I went through the exact same thing, I've probably made an entry on this but to say it bluntly, she was a bitch, and if the outcome on my end was the same as Russell's, then not to think you, Laura, are a bitch, but something had definitely been done on your party's part, though you can condradict me, flame me, however, it couldn't have just been Russ alone, otherwise he'd just be depressed, or hoped for better.

And about the school thing, that also happened with me and with the police, it was a total bitch but I pushed it all aside. Most likely, someone from the opposite party (that not of Russell), had taken the liberty to call a few people, unless you accidently left the URL to your journal lying on a school PC or left on a happen to be large piece of paper, which I'd think not of. Hopefully you will have the same outcome as me, everything back to normal, and no, or not much, harm done.
22 comments or Leave a comment