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The Autobiography of Russell
Life from a different perspective
Branching out from OkCupid
I've been thinking about trying something different. The selections and responses on OkCupid have been abysimal, so the thought is that maybe another site, like Match, will have a better selection and, hopefully, reply rate. As it stands I've already gone through everyone available locally on OkCupid that I find interesting and tried to contact them, yet the only ones that contact me are ones that I'm not really attracted to (or turn out to have a trait that just wouldn't work, like being a blatant liar or so full of themselves they just don't care).

Has anyone had any experience with Match, or would recommend another site if I'm going to end up plopping down cash (the gay version of eHarmony perhaps?)?

Please keep in mind that I'm not looking for sex so a site like Gay.com probably isn't going to work. Primarily I want to hang out and share a conversation first to get to know them better, then see where it goes from there. Oh, and poly-friendly.

Tags: ,
Current Mood: disappointed disappointed

11 comments or Leave a comment
divaprime From: divaprime Date: February 17th, 2010 06:10 pm (UTC) (Link)
There's also polymatchmaker.com, lovemore.com, modernpoly.com
From: better_angel Date: February 17th, 2010 06:11 pm (UTC) (Link)
Well, I've a gay.com username for years now. And I'm not trolling for sex. I've met many good friends through it--guys who would be good boyfriend material; you just have to develop a knack for weeding out the wrong guys.
zimzat From: zimzat Date: February 17th, 2010 07:43 pm (UTC) (Link)
Do you pay for it in order to message people back, have they removed that restriction, or do you only go to the chat rooms?

I don't have the attention span to sit around chat rooms for long or very frequently.
heartirony From: heartirony Date: February 17th, 2010 07:40 pm (UTC) (Link)
Check out the poly folk on fetlife.com
divaprime From: divaprime Date: February 17th, 2010 07:55 pm (UTC) (Link)
forgot plentyoffish.com free site, no poly category but they do have "open relationship.
zimzat From: zimzat Date: February 17th, 2010 08:30 pm (UTC) (Link)
I'm a little disappointed the website doesn't understand 'Bi', not that it actually affects me, but still.

They also have a hidden restriction that your username can't be the same as the first part of your email address, but the error message just says 'choose a different username'. Surprisingly enough I was able to get around that just by removing the client-side check for it and the server didn't complain (Sweet! HA! Oh... wait, that makes me wonder how secure this site is. I wonder how susceptible this site is to be hacked.... uh oh).

The creator could use a few lessons in creating a clean user-friendly interface, and coming from me that's saying something.
(Deleted comment)
zimzat From: zimzat Date: February 18th, 2010 12:58 am (UTC) (Link)
I hear ya on the plain text password. That probably means everyone's passwords are in plain text in the database as well. Add to that the ability to bypass registration restrictions simply by modifying the client-side scripts, and I'm suspicious that something as simple as SQL Injection could reveal the entire database to anyone with enough knowledge to try.

And I'll second the bad layout. Putting miniature listings and other large junk above page-critical information (such as the inbox listing) is a huge waste.

I don't know about the creepy people thing, though. While a large majority of the profiles I've seen so far have limiting factors of interest, and some I've already tried to contact on OkCupid to no avail, there have been a few that looked interesting and had decent profiles.
sisyphus238 From: sisyphus238 Date: February 18th, 2010 02:37 am (UTC) (Link)
Have you tried Chemistry.com? Before eHarmony decided it would make economical (not to mention moral) sense to open its process to gays, Chemistry.com was calling them on it.
I haven't tried it. There's a long questionnaire and, I imagine, a price to be paid which may or may not be worth it, but the ads are clever.

Edited at 2010-02-18 02:39 am (UTC)
zimzat From: zimzat Date: February 18th, 2010 06:53 am (UTC) (Link)
I thought I heard it was a lawsuit that forced eHarmony to open their process to gays (via a secondary website copy of the main one). A previous co-worker and I got into a discussion over it a while back and he made the point that they shouldn't have been forced to change how their business works. A lot of restaurants I've been to lately have signs disclaiming "We Reserve The Right To Refuse Service To Anyone", which basically sounds like they can kick anyone, for any reason or no reason, out. If that actually holds true then there's no reason a website can't be picky about who they work with.
buddha17 From: buddha17 Date: February 18th, 2010 06:04 am (UTC) (Link)
Two of my most fantastic boyfriends were folks I met on LiveJournal, actually! But, it has kinda waned in the time since then... :-( So has OkCupid, I feel...
zimzat From: zimzat Date: February 18th, 2010 06:29 am (UTC) (Link)
I'll second that. Several of my first boyfriends were from LiveJournal as well. Point of fact is there are several people on LiveJournal even today I wish I could get to know better, if only for a difference in location. I'm hoping I can remedy that when I start making more travel plans between destinations in March, May, and July. I'd love to meet more LiveJournalers in person.
11 comments or Leave a comment